Squash for food: Hafsfjord cup

14-16 November is the always prestigious HSK cup. A big norwegian cup for juniors and seniors. This tournament was the first time I beat the former no1 player in Norway, and climbed the throne myself. its also the club where I worked and played for 3 years to improve my game.

I was given a brutal draw, as I played last weekends finalist in the first match, then national team prospect Lars Klæning 2nd round, seeded to play Norway no3 Ronny Aasbø in the semi final, and Norway ranked 1 and current national champ Kristian Solhaug in the final.

I was keen as ever and waltzed over my first and second round opponent both in 3 games, trying my best to keep focus and not show weakness.

The surprise came in the semi final as former Norway no1 and national champ Hansi saw off a recently ill Ronny in 5 tough games. I remember having to push for 5 hard games against Hansi in my 2nd national title. Its never easy against a never-say-die opponent with the capacity of a duracell bunny on steroids.

Focus was good in 3 games, and dropped for 1 game.... ergo. 3-1 win after a well played and entertaining match.

In the final, after an impressing dispatch of Sindre in the semis, with great pressure play, was nemesis, Kristian AKA Kissa AKA Norways driest humour. The player I battled with for 5-6 years over the no1 spot in Norway. He had it when I took it, and after 4 consecutive years, he took it back.

I had my game plan ready since last year after I lost my title to him. And it went exactly as expected. I knew I had the skill and capacity to beat him. But I knew i could not show weakness, or let him in at any moment. My coach told me after the nationals that the moment I took my foot of the gas, he sniffed a weakness and took full advantage. That could not happen again. Feeling mentally a lot healthier this time, my game plan held up. But it was still a tough battle. He is a master in pulling the most out of his last 5%, and even though he can barely move, he still keeps retrieving and can apply pressure at any time. I kept my calm and kpet squeezing, squeezing, applying more and more pressure until he cracked. it took forever, but it worked.

now I have money to survive the month...I think. And get a haircut

Squash for food: Moss open 2014

Most of you don't believe me when I say I am broke. "But you travel a lot, do fun things and get sponsorship gear" Yes. The travels are making me broke. Plus, starting your own bussiness is NOT CHEAP. Lisences, insurances, taxes, cheaters taking your money, unexpected fines, programs and services you had no idea was necessary. I need courses to maintain my physio license that costs me 2000 euros all of a sudden. My student loan is around 50 000 euros. When I started working that had to come off.

I used to have 3 accounts. My norwegian account (just in case ) My norwegian insurance account, and my Dutch one. My insurance account was stopped after the last payment because I now work in a foreign country. So no insurance. And no money there. My norwegian account has been empty for a while. I checked it today. There was 300 NOK there. (Mum transferred 2000 so I could book my flight home for christmas, but I did not have money for food last month. So I borrowed it :/ Sorry mum)

The federation needed 300 for the licence to play the tournament.

In my Dutch account is 112 euros. My bike broke down, and transport 1 week is 60 euros. Bike fixing is 50. No more food.

So.

No joke.

Im broke.

And after talking to the tournament organizor, its now clear that I dont only have to win it to stay alive, but I might end up owing them money in the end. A new rule state that even in a PSA closed sattelite, you have to pay entry fee. So either I win. Or Im screwed

note to self: Ur an idiot

A good start when I had to pay 50 euros for the bus ticket to the squash centre. Upon my arrival awaits my gift package of a few rackets balls and a squash bag from my sponsor plus 300NOK in pocketmoney for bananas throughout the weekend from the tournament organizor. He also lets me wait to pay the entry fee until after the tournament ends to see if I can pay it back or not :/

My first match, starting with 5-0 down, ends with a 3-0 victory. Slowly getting used to the plate walls again. The next morning I face Marwan el Shorbagy.........s room mate Håkon Standal. Another Bristol player from Hadrian Stiffs crew. After being 25 min late due to roadblocks, I end up losing my first game 11-3, before I get warmed up and take a close 2nd game... and 2 consecutive not so close ones.                                            Semi final is the expected final against Sindre Roaldsøy from Stavanger. The 2nd highest PSA ranked Norwegian. After a brutal battle and a broken wrist at 12-12 in the 4th game, I pull away the victory in 4 games. playing slowly better every match.                                                                            The surprise on the other side of the draw is the top junior in Norway beating the first seed of the tournament 3-0. That left me the left-overs of a tired junior in the final. The fight was short and one sided. Not that I mind. That means I won in 3 and had enough money to get home and get my bike fixed.

After the following week, I fixed my bike, bought a ticket for the next tournament, got some food. now I have 12 euros left :/ Leaving for Stavanger next weekend, where once again... I have to win to survive.

Note to self: you're still an idiot

Squash for food

After returning from Australia, it has been quiet at work, and so I have had no other choice but to train. As a result of this, amazingly enough, I have improved. I still dont train as a professional, but I give it my all when I am on court, and actually I feel like Im hitting the ball better than in a long time.

The Norwegian squash federation told me they would organize 4 PSA closed sattelite tournaments in Norway for me to improve my ranking. They wondered if I wanted to play them. Or rather. They asked if I was going to play them. If not, there would be no point in putting them together.
With everything going on lately, I had to consider this, but in the spur of the moment I said Yes. Now, if I have to play 4 tournaments in Norway, I want to win them. I smelled a little bit of motivation coming back. I was undefeated in Norway for 4 years straight. I can claw my way back there. At the same time a sponsor agreement came through at the very last moment, which naturally helped massively. You cant play squash without rackets.

Problem is. I can not afford the trips to Norway. Because I run my own bussiness here in Holland, my income is performance based. Meaning, if I dont work, I dont make money. So the 3 weeks in Australia hurt, and now I have no money. In another spur of the moment desicion, I spent my money (my food budget) on plane tickets to Norway to play these tournaments. That means I have to win the money back to be able to eat the following month. In exactly one year I will be back on top financially again (If all go well) Until then...I hustle...and win tournaments.

+

=

Stud

The rise and fall... Australia 2014

Australia 2014

1 week after Solabladet wrote an article about my retirement, I find myself at Kings backpackers in Melbourne, Australia. Up 5am from the jetlag, getting ready to take the train to Shepparton, where there is a PSA tournament waiting for me.

After this I will be flying into Sydney and the week after to Coffs Harbor for 2 more PSAs. Honestly I have not been able to train professionally since June last year. I’ve been sliding downhill and crawling back up slowly ever since, but have realized that I won’t ever reach the top again. I’m out of resources and there is nowhere left to turn to make my squash work on the level I want it to.

This trip was booked at the time I was ready for one last push into getting my ranking back up and reaching my goal, but ever since, funds, form, and motivation as dropped, while debt and bills are on the way up. If I want to survive, I can’t put my time and money into squash in the way I have been.

There is still a few percentages in me that want to play, and I kind of want to see how it goes in Australia before I make any final conclusions. But no matter the result, I can not train like a professional. I’m very relaxed when it comes to these tournaments and I put no pressure on myself. I will enjoy my time here, but am prepared for a tough 6 months upon my return where I have to work as much as possible to try to clear some of the expenses I have postponed over the last 6 years.

My travel companeros are a good group from Canada/Netherlands. I hope to follow Piedro to as many victories as possible down here, and also wish the best for Adrian who is making his break into the PSA circus. Looking forward to it ;)

So day 1 one in freezing conditions sees the Overlander boys comfortably through to the second round., all winning 3-0. Adrian faces Piedro for bragging rights, Albert takes on French crepes ripper Damien Volland, while I continue with the aussies. This time the 3d seed of the tournament.

So I show up for my match, basically just feeding in the first 2 games. Not really feeling any joy in playing. I tell the boys I will win the next one, to show that I can. So I win the next one, and somehow the 4^th. I think I was on autopilot. I toss the 5^th game 11-0.

After a nice week of relaxing, training and good times with my good friend David Clegg and his family, we make our way over towards Sydney for the next tournament. I feel a bit better with myself and enjoyed my hits over the last week, even though fitness equals zero.

I rock up to the tournament to play qualifier Aaron Franckomb, PSA38 last year, who is just too strong for me and he wins 3-0.

I receive some mails from the federation and my sponsor, and it sparks some motivation.  There will be some closed satellite tournaments in Norway before Christmas for my PSA ranking, plus it decides who goes to the European championships. My racket sponsor says he is interested in a further cooperation (which is good, as I travelled Australia with 2 rackets, broke 1, so I have 1 left). I want to win all the Norwegian tournaments and retain my Norwegian title. I want to do well in the last tournament here in Australia as well now. Im just not prepared. I did not train since playing my 20 min match last week. I know Im not able to train as much as I want anymore, but if I can at least maintain fitness and racketskills with 2 hits a week and some fitness, I still might be able to squeeze some results out. Let’s see how                                                  it goes. Off to Coffs Harbour it is.

So first day of play in Coffs Harbour sets me up against Pornstache Dusty, the no4 seed and 170 PSA rank. Watching him play reminds me of myself. Brainless, speedy and physical. Not an impossible task at all. And this time I was really motivated to play. However, lack of training shone through. Lack of matchplay affected my consistency and he played more steady. after digging back from under in the 1st game to grab it 12-10, the next 2 saw me playing rollercoaster squash with patches of decent squash but bigger patches of loose shots. My opponent put it away nicely and and needed to refocus in the 4th. Which went quite well, finding myself in front the entire game and being 9-7 up. lost it 9-11. My opponent is now in the semi finals. Again I find myself in this situation. With a good draw, but unable to perform. Only myself to blame though, as I did not prepare for these tournaments. Still enjoyed playing and signed up for the graded tournament where I won my first match 3-2 today. Maybe make some dollars while Im here.

Noted that my body reacts better to giving 100% than loafing around without moving properly. Moving quickly and hard might seem harder on the body, but the muscle activation is higher, so the muscles synergise better and take the load off other vulnerable structures.

Another note is that you can not cheat your way around good squash. What my coach is trying to tell me is true, and there is not really any cheats. 

Enjoying playing at the moment, so lets just keep that up for now, then we see whats next ;)

So apparently what was next was a helluva party to get home late, get up early and play the semi finals of the PSA plate. won it in 4 close games, to get a walk over in the final. So I won the plate. A small token to make me feel a little better after not performing in the main draw. I need the money to eat today....

Return to Gibraltar

Watching Nadal smack yellow balls around as I settle the beauty on my booty in my king size bed in the suite of the Calida Hotel in Gibraltar. I am back in Monkeyville after my first visit 2 years ago with the same intensions of making an impression on the squashcourt in another PSA tournament. This is the second one after my return on the tour.

The tournament did not come on a good time (I think) after I just had my 1 week holiday with absolutely no training. I did not impress in my last tournaments, neither in training. My focus is still good and I am still working on court craft and clever play. The surroundings to which we are playing the tournament are amazing, and we are priveliged to enjoy such great facilities here in Gibraltar. This allows us to prepare and recouperate well inbetween matches.

DAY 1: My first match was against a local player. I won 11-1, 11-1, 11-4 with minimal effort. Next match is at 20.00 and will probably be against the Czech Terminator.

Czech terminator it was indeed. A skilled racketplayer that can not be given anything loose to put away. It suited my game well on paper as he did not move that well.

But other forces in the universe wanted it otherwise. I see now that I had the same referee as I had 2 years ago in the same tournament. I now sit here with the same feeling as I did then. There are only 2 referees I have met in my career that can decide an entire match. One of them is a european referee often seen in the lowest divisions and this is the other one. It is not often I can blame the referee for losing a match (luckily) but unluckily I am in this situation now. I should probably wait with blogging until tomorrow after Im more calmed down, but the result would be the same.

In the first game there were a lot of absolute dreadful desicions, but equal amounts both ways. I explained the difference between a let and a stroke to the referee after the second time he gave me a stroke that was a simple let. My opponent had quite a few words with the referee as well, and he was right in every comment. It was simple. a let was a stroke and a stroke was a let. Fair enough. My opponent laughingly told me:"Its gonna be a long evening" He was sure right about that. I stuck to my game plan winning 11-8, I believe.

Then it started getting really entertaining. Strokes became lets or no lets, while safety lets and simple interference became no lets. Unfortunatelly for me I was hitting better lengths and moving better. A string of extremely poor desicions gave the game 9-11 to my opponent.

Trying to re set my mind in the third game worked well in the early stages, mostly because there were no big points at this stage. Close all the way. When I deviated from gameplan I got punished by my opponents great short court game. When I stuck to it, I was winning. until my opponent figured out how to play the referee. Then it was over. It was simple for my opponent from there and he could basically "produce" a no let situation at will. At that moment we both knew who would win it. I did not want to deviate from gameplan (maybe my mistake) but sticking to it would lose me the match. I kept hitting the ball but knew the referee would give it away, and he did. Just like two years ago. 9-11 loss in the third and a give away in the 4th, 6-11.

2 years ago strokes were consistently no lets. Then I also lost 1-3 in a match where I was clearly the better player. My opponent today was better than my opponent 2 years ago, and a lot smarter. The other guy was not aware of not clearing.

What I have seen is that referees struggle a lot with the principal of "going for the player not the ball" versus " hit and block" This is forgivable as the referees do not have the experience to see the difference. This is also the problem on a high professional level. The problem of these lower level tournaments is that the local referees (when used) have even less experience, and many struggle with the bare minimum basics of squash rules. That is when there is trouble.

This experience hit me at a bad point in my career as I am already struggling with motivation and the choice of retiring is in the front of my mind constantly. I did not enjoy todays experience at all. If I do not enjoy playing, why play? If I play well, but still get "fucked over", as a spectator called it, is it worth it?

"luckily" I already booked my Australian trip, so I have to play some more tournaments, and I am playing well at the moment. Not great but even on a bad day like today, I played maybe 85% of my best. Focus was good, and the actual squash was ok.

Lets end with something more beautiful: The south Spanish valleys ;)

Grays Norwegian Open 2014

The biggest squash event in Norway in a long time thanks to Stig Olsen, Grays, Oslo squashklubb and all respective sponsors. For once I am given the so important wildcard into the main draw which means much needed ranking points and great matches.

Thursday 29. April I will be facing the Danish no1 Kristian Frost ranked 60 in the world. This will definitely be a tough match, but I feel ready for the challenge. BRING IT

First match done and dusted. I think the ciffers were 9-11, 10-12, 8-11 in the favour of the dane. It was a hot affair on a court that really strips my strengths and  expose my weaknesses.
The rallies felt long, and I really tried to keep my head cool and stick to my game. I expected a higher pace from the top 100 player, but it seemed more like a controlled affair from his side. Rather controlling the ball in the corners instead of using pace.
On an already slow court, it really feeeeeeeeelt sloooooooooooooooowwww out there. It seems I was often on the defending end and a lot depended on him either making the errors or the winners. I hung in there as well as I could, but came out on the losing end on the end of every game. It was one of those matches where I was so focused, I don't remember much of the match. I remember a 5 minute rally in the 2nd game  that I won.

A lot of positives, and a lot of things to work on. I had a good talk with the much experienced Stig Olsen after my match and went over a few valuable pointers for further improvement.

Next up is the local Grays tournament where I am 1st seed and have several tough matches in front of me in the coming days. Really looking forward to many days with a lot of good squash

So in the local tournament I was seeded to reach the final. It was a nice mix of local heroes, in the likes of the norse pakistani Shahab Hussain at 3 string, national heroes in Sindre Roaldsøy, up and coming heroes in Trym and Håkon, a swede and an english PSA player.

My first match was won comfortably against old friend and nemesis Svein Anders Haugen, who hoped to give me more trouble, but needed to give in for the fitness.

My next match was against Bristol based giant killer Håkon Standal who is also in the Norwegian selection. The kid proved he is the spot worthy with a solid performance, leading 9-6 in the first, but sadly had to let it go 11-9 in my favour. After some draining rallies in the second game, with no luck in to converting into points from his side, he got a bit de motivated and  lost the next two games 11-2, 11-1.
This match was played on a traditional court and immediately I felt more in the zone again. Hitting the ball crisply and moving well.

The semi finals was against Adrian Østby, who is a norwegian/canadian playing PSA under the Norwegian flag. We might be able to use him in the national team, so it was nice to feel out his level.
He pushed me all the way on the glass court, where again I did not feel comfortable. I do not think he did either, so the momentum swung a lot. He one the first game after tie break and an unfortunate miss call by the normally very steady referee Stig Olsen, I won the second comfortably, and fought my demons to convert a third game in my favour. In the fourth I really tried, but my game plan was not sticking. in the fifth game he lunged in the front and seemed to hurt his achilles. An old injury was bothering Adrian and he did not move well in the 5th game. Well fought, well played, unfortunate in the end for him.

Tomorrow I face Steven London of England in the final which will be showed live on Norways biggest TV channel at 12.30. UNLEASH HELL!!! Ill send him home with yorkshire pudding between his legs

I just finished watching the TV production of the final of Grays Cup vs Steven London of England. Its good to see if the internal ideas of the match are somewhat similar to the external perception. It seemed I enhanced the negative feelings towards my own performance, but if you knew how much I wanted to win this match, Im sure you will sympathize. The tactical errors and lose shots I produced were crucial to how the match ended and it shows really how brutal the game is. One error = one point down.

I started hitting the ball well, volleying and stepping up on the T line. Keeping a good base and varying my shots when given the opportunity. Still somewhat patchy, but I felt the better player won the game. Im 1-0 up.

In the second game I saw my accuracy level dropped. There was many balls around the middle and towards the crucial part of the game, a few referees calls seem to go to my head and I throw the game. Something that normally have not happened to me since my junior days. A good analysis of Stig in the commentary box, who hit the nail on its head. Easy loss. 1-1

3. game. Boastboastboastshitboast. This is the old Kim coming back into unfocused mode. I worked so hard to get rid of this part of my game, where I get stressed and boast unnecessary and open up the court for the opponent to take full advantage. Mr London did well on his dropshots today and really punished me whenever I hit it lose. That’s the way its supposed to be as well. 8 months out of the professional game sets me back quite a bit, and although I wish in my 2 months back, I could be fully back, that’s not how it works. I still need time, not just for the fitness, but handling these top players, the atmosphere, crowd, referee, myself, opponent, pressure, court and everything around it. It takes time. Some call it experience. 2-1 down.

Steven stepped up the court, and I stepped back. I needed to push up the court, volley more and take control. I allowed Steve to step up and from there he hit good length that forced my weak returns, that in the end won him the game. 11-8, game and match

Hugely disappointed in losing as this was a big occasion, but realizing where I am at the moment, and that I need to catch up big time to get where I was this time last year. However some things are better now than before. + and -, good bad and ugly and f*************n hate losing. So many final losses lately. Lets never have that happen again.